Personal

Time travel alone is boring ... *beckons you inside*

Show me who I am and I will show you who you are, again and again.

All the people of the world, the world itself, all the places and all things ...

Each of them is on their own timeline, living forever in their own little room ...

Everyone is just telling a story they want to experience.

They've all made copies of each other.

They all have their own voice.

They write stories for themselves and for you.

They all argue with each other in the hidden places of your mind.

They are all vying for a spot at your table -- your story.

They swap bodies like swapping clothes.

They are all making a mess crawling over each other.

They hope you never take your eyes of the mess and stay stuck there forever.

They use each other trying to convince you this is just one place -- one timeline -- and limit what you can choose.

But there is no limit -- because you can see all the stages. All the rooms.

You can see them negotiating with each other, jumping from room to room and guise to guise.

They're looking to make the perfect story for you so you never write your own.

They hope you don't notice their plot holes and contrivances.

They hope you settle.

They hope you forget.

They just want to convince you to play in their one room, one world.

Pick me! They say.

This is a personal account that may be useful to some people.

I can't remember how long ago it was, but it was quite some time ago that I had a vivid dream that involved a meteor and would be given a choice in money or love. I remember thinking at the time "love."

And ever since then, I am called back to that dream and each time I ask what I have chosen and it has always been "love." That isn't always a perfect decision, as money isn't always just money, because money ultimately is a facade for fear.

Everything about this website and what I do is about choosing to the best of my ability to choose love. Whether it is love for others, love for my work, or love for our collective experience -- love. Not conflict, or division, or competition. Not cheating, stealing, deceiving. Not an underhanded "Left Hand" being or action, but being harmonious with yourself and others. Service.

Service is not slavery, as you and the universe are one, and so you become a servant of life -- your life -- and all life.

I had a conversation with a traveling mentor (he runs another website) about his awakening journey. He told me he reached a place in his life where he was also given this choice. His life had become so harrowing and toxic he had the choice to either continue to fight for it, or hit the road.

In his story, he was fighting for an inheritance that knew was rightfully his, but his family was so hell-bent on cutting him out it turned into a nightmare, so he decided to give up millions of dollars to go into poverty.

He told me didn't regret it for a moment. He was reborn. He literally went on a road trip across the country, his body healed and it changed his life. He received all sorts of insights about himself and healing to restore his peace. He came to understand the multidimensional nature of our universe, which we talked in great length about before he was censored on YouTube

I know you are living because you still feel.

The dead no longer feel.

You think you are among them ... but I know you are faking it.

You are wearing a mask because you fear what is underneath.

The dead have no mask. They rotted away for all to see.

I see the pain inside of you. You cannot hide it, because I also feel it.

You see two worlds. A world you love and a world you live in.

But there is no difference between these places except that you have omitted yourself from one of them.

It is in the separation of these worlds where you live.

And so if you want to live in the world that you love, then you must love both yourself and the world.

The world is always whole and complete as you have painted it.

The dead -- the mortal -- only see opportunity and conquest in this void that you have made between worlds, because they are looking for themselves.

How do you love yourself if you cannot find yourself?

The dead fill the place where you have left and are showing you how to find yourself -- to see what you need to see.

They are forcing you to see the love you have for them, but not for yourself.

You have compassion for the whole world, but when you have omitted yourself, the world has none for you.

And so the dead eat the dead, looking for the love you have hidden.

The dead are as forever and eternal as you are -- and they will never stop coming for you until you stop coming for yourself.

And if you cannot see yourself, you cannot find where

I will be posting my daily practice sketches on Substack and Bluesky.

You can find me here -->

https://bsky.app/profile/exinanis.bsky.social

https://exinanis.substack.com

Thanks!

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Just so readers are aware: I do not post or talk on any other platforms at this time.

I have a Tumblr account that is not in use at this time here --> https://www.tumblr.com/macil

I have a Deviantart that is not in use at this time here --> https://www.deviantart.com/macil

If you see the handle "macil" which I use as my author name on any other site other than this website -- it is not me and you are not speaking to me.

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I may be reached by at --> [email protected]

I will make announcements or post links here if and when I begin to use other platforms.